The day after the cerclage

Thank you so much for the encouragement and prayers.

Teddy Graham and I are still alive and hopefully on the road to recovery. I was very groggy and out of it yesterday, but at least I got a good sleep last night.

Yesterday was pretty awful. I was soooo worried that any moment my water would break, or something else bad would happen. I held on to hope with all of my strength and Teddy Graham and I are still here!

The cerclage was not fun. They tried to do a spinal (same thing they would do as for c-section) and they couldn't get it in. It was SOOO painful, because she kept missing, they tried for about 15 minutes and then gave up and just knocked me completely out. So I don't remember anything until I woke up.

The Dr said it went well my water bag is still in tact THANK GOD!!! when he got in there he said my cervix was still long enough to get in a good stitch (I'll have to ask for numbers) and he felt the surgery went well. after I woke up I was having severe cramping, which hurt REALLY bad but apparently was not contractions so that is good, and I haven't had any contractions since I got here so that's also a good sign. I bled from the procedure yesterday and through the night it tapered off, this morning it's almost gone so they tell me that's good too.

The plan is I'll be in the hospital for a few more days and if everything goes well they will send me home on complete bed rest. They will wait a week and then do another ultrasound to check my cervix, if it's looking good and the stitch is holding they will let me sit up a bit during the week and then recheck. eventually he hopes to have me on modified bed rest but it all depends on how my cervix behaves.

I feel better about getting up to go to the bathroom today knowing how well they got the stitch in and that everything is being held in place and I'm aloud to incline the head of the bed just a little bit. I also might get to have a very quick shower today.

The biggest worry right now is whether or not I had a pre-exsting infection. The dr would not have done the surgery if he felt it was a likely possibility, so he thinks I probably don't, but there still is a chance.

Right now I feel like I have hope, this might sound crazy but knowing what is wrong and why I lost Gabriel, knowing that there is something proactive I can do next time to prevent this makes me feel a little better. It makes me feel like everything just might be ok. Yes it sucks that I have an incompetent cervix, my dumb body is the one not functioning and my babies have to pay the price, but at least there is something they can do.

As much as yesterday was hard emotionally, physically painful, stressful and scary, I would do it over and over again if I had to. I will fight for the life of this baby, he will not leave me without a fight.